Truth About Computer Security Hysteria
Open letter to CEO of Continental AirlinesRob Rosenberger, Vmyths co-founder
Wednesday, 12 October 2005
DEAR MR. KELLNER,
I hear you recently laid 6,000 jobs to rest at Continental Airlines. I recently laid my wife to rest, so I know exactly how you feel. My condolences. I just hope none of those employees worked in your computer security department, because your computer security failures are vital to the success of your firm.
An open letter to Larry Kellner, the chairman & CEO of Continental Airlines
You know what you should do, Mr. Kellner? Seriously — you should hire disgraced FEMA director Michael Brown to manage your computer security team.
Brown has a spectacular record of failing at the crucial moment when he needs to succeed. And that's what your computer security team does best, right? Their antivirus "solution," for example, routinely fails at the crucial moment when your company needs it to succeed. Nathan Hanks, your managing director for technology, admitted Continental cannot stop hackers who would cancel or delay flights on a whim.
And — like Hanks — Brown has the uncanny ability to blame everything but himself for his failures.
Disgraced FEMA director Michael Brown is quite simply the most logical choice to head up computer security at Continental Airlines. He'll implement all the "solutions" you need to fail. I hear he's still looking for a job, which is great news for you. Snap him up!