Truth About Computer Security Hysteria

Iraqi cyber-insurgents demand release of Sasser & Agobot worm authors ''or else!''

THE "WATER COOLER moths" at your company will buzz with excitement on Monday morning as they discuss the recent arrests of the creators behind the Sasser worm, the NetSky virus, the Agobot worm, and the Phatbot worm.

Iraqi cyber-insur­gents re­leased a com­mu­ni­qué this week­end. It carried an ulti­ma­tum — either Ger­many re­leases the Sasser & Agobot worm authors, or they'll digi­tally re­peat the WWII bombing of Berlin.

But I doubt they'll feel very happy about the arrests.

Water cooler moths will see it as a cloud in their silver lining. I can already hear their pithy banter. "I'll miss the simple pleasure of sipping purified toilet water from a Dixie cup while all the computers are down. Man, the Sasser worm's devastation was great! It gave me an excuse to spend whole days replacing water bottles on every floor of the building. Now I'll have to get in line with everyone else at the espresso machine if I want to shoot the breeze with my cubicle neighbors on company time..."

But water cooler moths aren't the only ones who will frown at the arrest of the worm authors. Cyber-terrorists have already started to voice their anger.

As you may know, a Washington think-tanker named Yonah Alexander fears Iraqi insurgents have access to a top-secret "cyber weapon." Believe it: Alexander wants me to lead my cyberwar commandos back into Iraq to find this weapon before the insurgents unleash it.

I once dismissed Alexander's fears as delusional. But now ... heaven forbid, he may be right.

Iraqi cyber-insurgents came out of hiding and released a communiqué this weekend. It carried an ultimatum — either Germany releases the Sasser & Agobot worm authors, or they'll digitally repeat the WWII bombing of Berlin. Boolean vengeance will abound if the Iraqi cyber-insurgents don't get their way!

Special thanks go to Pete Shipley for acquiring a copy of the communiqué. He literally risked his PC's life just to get his hands on it for your amusement. Warning: this video is not for the timid (and it requires a DivX codec). You'll watch in horror as the cyber-insurgents deliver their ultimatum to Germany...