Truth About Computer Security Hysteria
The return of Blitzkrieg!
Thursday, 26 October 2000
"I SEE DEAD people."
A guy named Larry Wood caused a major controversy in 1998 when he announced the imminent debut of a "Blitzkrieg server" computer virus. His company publicized it as — literally — the final evolution in information warfare. Yet Wood's claims about Blitzkrieg seemed to defy the known laws of physics & mathematics.
And there were those heavily armed ex-Marines who descended from the ceiling... (I'm not making this up.)
Wood and his company disappeared in 1998 after he failed to substantiate his claims. Well, he set up another company last year in another state and renamed his product. Then he ironically pitched his über-virus to the Pentagon as a Y2K virus cure-all.
Wood switched back to his original company & product names earlier this month. He now wants to sell Blitzkrieg as a "trusted insider problem" cure-all. And you can order a copy for $4,850 MSRP. Yes, the return of Larry Wood marks a new chapter in a truly weird story.
"How weird, Rob?" Okay, I'll tell you. But remember! You asked.
Blitzkrieg doesn't really "exist" like the ones & zeroes of a regular binary program. Instead, Wood's virus does its calculations in a quantum physics state known as "superposition." Blitzkrieg literally ceases to exist in quantifiable terms at this point, meaning we probably can't watch it with a software debugger. According to Wood, "when [Blitzkrieg is] in the coherent superposition or potentia state, the system and its interactions appear as 'random noise.' "
Hint: study the last nine words.
Oh, I almost forgot. Wood upgraded Blitzkrieg with — get this — a "patent pending encrypted agile channel hoping [sic] digital spread spectrum over IP burst communication tunneling protocol." Like I said: a truly weird story. Be novel and read it from the beginning.
And stay tuned. Things might get very interesting in the next few days...
Memo to the Pentagon: download my investigative report about Larry Wood and his Blitzkrieg server computer virus. Oh, and say hello to the SECDEF for me.